Missing a family member
Weeks ago I was told by my mom that our maid Nikam is returning back to her country on the 30th of October. She has been with us for the past 4 years and have played an important role in our family. It's kind of sad that she has left us, but we are also happy that she is going back to be with her family and friends in Indonesia.

4 years ago, she came to Singapore in search of an oppurtunity to earn some money for her family. She is of a small stature and like most of our previous domestic helpers, looked very simple. However, it may be because of that that she is so diligent and thrifty. She is always up very early to make breakfast for us and sweeping the floor or feeding the pets. She would keep the house spick and span and kept everything in order. When she first arrived, she did not speak any english and it took some time for her to pick up the langauge. Fortunately, she managed to learn the basics and made communication alot more convenient. Because of the country she came from, she was not accustomed to the food we eat. She would think that the food is very bland as their diet there was very salty. So she added soya sauce to her rice and food. Her cooking was a tad too salty for our taste, and my dad taught her how to cook. Slowly, she learnt to appreciate our food.

During the time when my sister was pregnant with my nephew, Nikam was there to make life more comfortable by meeting her needs. This is no mean feat since my sister has a horrible attitude. She was also there to look after my nephew during his infant days. My mom took leave in the 1st few weeks to look after my nephew, and Nikam was there to help warm the milk at 3 am in the morning. I think, she made life alot more easier for both of them.

Then there was the time that my dad was badly hurt from a fall and under went surgery. Times were bad then, with most of us having to divert our focus from our daily work to look after my dad. I had to leave halfway during my projects and lessons to go to the hospital, while my mom and sis took time off from work. We were all exhausted and frightened and Nikam took care of the house so that we could concentrate on other things.

For me, I am a person who doesn't show emotions easily. I think I am pretty easy going and don't really demand alot of things. However, I do change clothings very frequently with the number of showers I take each day. Furthermore, the sports I do can make washing my clothes a chore. The number of clothes I change out of each day rivals that of the my whole family combined. For the past 3 months, I have been staying in the hostel. I wash my own clothes during the weekdays, but I will bring back some clothes that I did not wash on friday nights after training. She is usually there to help me movemy stuff from the car into the house, despite the time I reach home. Despite all these, I never really expressed my gratitude to her.

Our family treated her like part of the family and I think my parents treats her like a daughter. She helps my mom with most of the domestic stuff, while my mom helps her tailor clothes. During festive seasons, alot of relatives visit our house and she would help to prepare the food and keep the place clean. However, my parents would give her a red packet during chinese new year. The amount they give is comparable to that given to my and my sister. She is so likeable that some of our relatives too treat her part of the family and give her money.

So when the eve of her departure came, we all had dinner together at home with my dad, mom, sister, brother-in-law, me and my nephew. We talked, we ate, we laughed. There was an air of sadness behind all these. My mom gave her a green packet as the Hari Raya Pausa was approaching and also as a thank you gift to her. Last night, I did not sleep. Partially, I was studying for my exams. The other part was because I felt sad. She was leaving early in the morning at 8 to catch a ferry to Batam then a flight home. And I was afraid that I would oversleep and not say my farewells. My parents slept early so that they could wake up early.

Morning came, and all of us are up early on a Sunday morning. She brewed coffee for us and packed her belongings and got ready to leave. We were all sad and she said her good byes. My mom told her to call us once she reached home using the handphone my mom bought for her. Somehow, our dogs kind of understood the sadness in the air and were rather down. They did not even want to eat their bread and just lay around. After some photo taking, she loaded her stuff into the car and my dad sent her to catch the ferry. My mom is crying in the living room downstairs, while tears are starting to well up as I m typing this entry. All I can say is that we are very fortunate to have such a good helper and a member in our family. I truly wish that she lead a happy life and will continue to keep in contact with us.

Bon voyage